A single engine private plane, skimming low over the Alaskan wilderness. Glacial waters as clear as a polished mirror, reflecting the vast primordial forests and savage peaks which loom above us: a testament to the stoic grandeur of an Earth which existed long before humanity and will continue to endure long after the footnote of our existence has been forgotten. For one glorious moment it feels as though the world was created just for us, but that was before the engine stalled mid-flight. Before the violent plummet and the mercy of a deaf God, before the ground accelerating toward us, all happening much too fast to regain altitude before the crash.
Month: February 2018
My reflection smiles more than I do
It’s no secret that I drink. My friends will make jokes like “your idea of a balanced diet is a beer in both hands”. I’ll laugh with them, but I don’t miss their pitying smirks. When I’m out, I’m out to have a good time though, and when I’m in… well either way, it feels like I’m only smiling once I’ve knocked back a few.
Putin doesn’t like my father
I don’t know if this is the right place to post this, but none of my friends will listen to me anymore and I don’t know who else to tell. I don’t have any ghost sightings to report, and there aren’t any monsters under my bed, but I’m not afraid of that sort of thing. I’m afraid of what’s happening to my family, and even worse, that everyone sees it happening but does nothing. It feels like drowning at a pool party, struggling and shouting and begging while all my friends silently watch.
She looks like a future victim #YouToo
How do killers and rapists choose their next victim? Does it have to do with some repressed childhood memory, fueling a blind hatred toward a particular type of person? Or is it just something they see in the moment: the shape of a body or her pretty face stirring the blood into an undeniable throb? Whatever it is, I understand why he chose my co-worker Casey. It’s hard even looking at her without letting your mind wander. It’s not that she’s overtly sexual or provocative or anything — it’s more the way she moves, graceful and flowing to the point where even waiting tables looks like an intricately choreographed ballet.
Clowns must not frown
When you made the worst mistake of your life, did you know it at the time? Or not until later? I don’t think my wife could have known what would happen when she hired clowns for my daughter’s birthday party, but that doesn’t make it any easier to bear.
Trapped between life and death
Eternity is the worst thing about being a ghost. I guess it’s the worst thing about being dead too, but I don’t suppose you’d really mind. Nothing will ever get better for me, although I don’t see how it could get worse either. I’m simply here: seeing but never seen, drifting without destination, waiting for nothing to arrive.
This flower only grows from corpses
My wife lost her battle against breast cancer last month, leaving me alone to take care of our daughter Ellie. Every single night Ellie asks if mom is going to tuck her in, and every night I have to beg her before she’ll let me do it instead. How can I even begin to explain to a four year old that she’ll never see her mommy again? I don’t even know how to explain it to myself.